Wedding

4 Tips For Proposals By A Real Man

This post might have come to you while searching for the best way to propose to your girlfriend. We are proud of you and your willingness to take the next step in your love life seriously. Saran, one of our readers, contributed the following advice.

Continue reading to learn more about another man’s perspective and his ideas for going above and beyond to love the one you love.

4 Tips for Proposals

My girlfriend and I were engaged on December 30, 2019, at Cuvier Park, La Jolla, San Diego. As I looked out at the Pacific Ocean, partly cloudy afternoon, my brain played a slideshow of the eight years we had together. I waited for my friends’ to take my future fiancee to the location. Although I was nervous, I felt confident that this was the beginning of the perfect night. My photographer Gene Higa was hiding with his camera in plain view just before I arrived. He gave me a wink and said, “You’re ready for the moment.” Spoiler alert! She said yes, and we had a wonderful night.

It was the best decision I made. Everyone approaches this milestone differently, but you must reflect on what is important to you and her before the day comes. Here are my top four tips to help you plan and execute the perfect proposal.

  1. This is your chance; make it memorable.
    1. I spent probably a few weeks searching for proposal ideas. I found “proposal planners” on numerous blogs/Instagram pages. It all felt wrong. Finally, I stopped and thought about all the memories and places that my fiancee and I had. We love to travel, love to see sunsets, and love to visit beaches and lakes. It was much easier to stop looking at the experiences of others and focus on my own. It was an easy decision to choose San Diego for our first trip together, as it was located on a cliff overlooking the beach at sunset. This leads me to my next tip…
  2. She already knows what she wants, so listen…
    1. She is not going to give you the blueprint for the perfect plan. If you are in the stage of planning to propose, there’s a good chance that you have had conversations with her or made comments about how it might look. LISTEN. Some people believe that less is better than others, while others think more is better. One example is that I have seen friends proposing in a Pizza Hut and others jumping from aeroplanes in exotic places. Because each of these moments was unique, they were all equally special and treasured by the couples. You should scale the experience according to her values and who she is. My fiance had dreamed of the proposal since childhood. It was important to her, so I increased the size of my proposal. Although she was keen to have a private proposal, she wanted to celebrate the occasion with her closest friends. I included this in my proposal.         
  3. Get her opinions from family and friends (if possible )…
    1. Proposing can be nerve-racking. No matter what you say, it is likely that you will make a lot of mistakes before popping the question. You will find the best friends in her family and friends if you can trust them to keep it secret. No matter how well you know your better half, her girlfriends/sisters/cousins know her differently. Ask them for their opinions! This is a great resource! If you’re looking to scale up your proposal experience, consider letting them help. They will 1) love being a part and 2) let you know if she is suspicious. My fiance would be a fashionista, while I am a casual wearer of basketball shorts and a t-shirt 95% of her time. Her family and friends were instrumental in ensuring she had dressed appropriately, had her nails done and was ready for whatever came her way.
  4. Attention to detail is what makes a great product or service.
    1. When planning the entire experience, be sure to consider the details that will make it feel seamless. There will be differences depending on what experience you have planned and who you are with. These are some examples of what I did. 1) Capture the moment. This is an important milestone that you will want to keep in mind, whether you hire a photographer to take the photos or ask someone to do it on your smartphone. 2) Keep it written down. In preparation, I spoke to many of my friends, who all said the same thing: I can’t recall what was said at the time, but I wish I could. I wrote down what I wanted to say, and then I kept it in a scrapbook with all our photos. It’s a hit with her. Give yourself another 30 minutes. You should give your fiance an extra 30 minutes if you plan a party, photoshoot, or any other activity after the proposal. Do not rush. 4) The proposal is only the beginning. You can plan a party or spend the rest of your day with her. But make sure that you have a plan. You can’t just wing it. BONUS: She will weep. Ask her friends to give you some of her makeup so that she can make some changes. This is a crucial decision.